How to deal with rejection in the admissions process

At the very end of your college admissions process, you will be faced with one of three outcomes: an acceptance, a rejection, or a waitlist.

As someone who applied to 20+ schools and was rejected from a vast majority of them...I can tell you that it never gets easier.

When I received my first rejection letter from my ED school (Duke University), I bawled my eyes out for probably an hour. I was heartbroken that the idea of what my future would look like was dismantled in a matter of minutes.

What did I do wrong? Was I not good enough? What if I had taken that extra AP test? What if I got an A instead of an A-? What if I did an internship or volunteered elsewhere?

Worse... what if I did everything I could, and I still wasn't good enough?

It’s easy to spiral into self-doubt, to feel like you’ve failed, or that your worth is tied to this one outcome. But this is what I was told, and what I want to tell you:

"Rejection doesn't mean you aren't good enough; it means the other person failed to notice what you have to offer." — Mark Amend

In the aftermath of that rejection, I learned that it was crucial to process my emotions. I allowed myself to grieve, to feel the weight of disappointment, and to acknowledge that it was okay to be upset.

But as time passed, I found solace in understanding that this rejection was not a reflection of my entire self. I sought out support from friends who were in similar situations, and it was comforting to share our experiences. We all faced rejections, but we also found humor in our shared struggles. This camaraderie helped me realize that rejection is part of a much larger narrative, one filled with twists and turns that can ultimately lead to unexpected opportunities.

Eventually, that rejection led me to a college that was the right fit for me. The excitement of starting anew overshadowed the sting of rejection, reminding me that sometimes, the best opportunities come when you least expect them.

So, as you begin your own journey, remember that rejection is not the end.

It’s a chance to reflect, redirect, and redefine your path.

Trust that you will find where you belong, and know that your worth is not measured by a letter but by your resilience, character, and the impact you have made and will undoubtedly continue to make on those around you!

Best of luck,
Melina Kazanas

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