One of my mentors used to ask a simple question: does it make the boat go faster? In college planning, you’re getting advice from every direction, from your uncle, your cousin, your neighbor, your neighbor’s cousin, all saying “you should do this, you should do that.” But does any of it actually help your child’s college planning journey? Here’s a simple three-column exercise to figure out what’s actually moving you forward, what’s wasting time, and what you need to investigate further.
It has been about a year since I made the original version of this video. I’m here on what I do every six months, which is what I call my think week. I turn my phone on airplane mode. I bring a whiteboard, a notebook, lots of books, and I think relentlessly about how I can improve as the founder of CollegeConsulting.us.
Our company’s mission is to be the United States’ most fun, effective, and motivating college planning resource for not just high schoolers, but parents of high schoolers as well.
So why am I making this video? Because I have a challenge for you.
Contents
The question that changes everything
The entire notion of this think week that I’m on comes from what one of my mentors used to say a lot:
Does it make the boat go faster?
What this question means
We are often bogged down in this world of stimuli, stimuli, stimuli. You’re getting information from every which way.
When it relates to college planning, you’re getting information from your uncle, your cousin, your neighbor, your neighbor’s cousin, all saying:
- “You should do this”
- “You should do that”
- “My kid did this and got into Harvard”
- “Have you considered research opportunities?”
- “What about internships?”
Taking time to reflect and ask, “Does it make the boat go faster?” means: does this actually deeply help my child progress their college plan? Does it make it fun, more effective, more exciting, more enjoyable? And yes, does it give them a better chance of success in getting into their dream college?
That’s the question. That’s what matters.
Why this matters now more than ever
It’s amazing how we’ve seen a huge uptick in questions from parents of high schoolers on introductory calls with our team that really show this notion of “does it make the boat go faster” is even more important now.
The questions we’re getting
We’re getting a lot of questions like:
- “Do you help out with internships?”
- “Do you help out with research opportunities?”
Whenever we get those questions, we help families take a step back and ask:
What is the ultimate goal?
Is the ultimate goal research opportunities? Is the ultimate goal an internship? Or is the ultimate goal putting your child in the best possible position to gain admission into their dream school?
Our mission
Our mission at CollegeConsulting.us is to make the boat go faster. Our mission is to help families optimize and complete high-leverage activities to give their child foundations that will ultimately lead to dream school acceptance.
Sometimes, in particular situations, that may be internships. That may be research opportunities. That may be community service.
But it also might not. That might not make the boat go faster in particular situations.
The honest truth
Here’s the honest truth. You might look at all the actions that you’re doing to help your high schooler and say:
“A lot of these, I don’t really know.”
- Is this really making the boat go faster?
- Are all these community service hours my child’s doing, is it making the boat go faster?
- Are all these clubs and activities my child is joining, is it making the boat go faster?
I don’t know.
And guess what? That is okay.
My think week motto right now, that’s on my whiteboard in my Airbnb, says:
“If you want to get things done, work. If you want to get the right things done, think.”
This is my way of saying: because I’m on think week myself, trying to figure out how to better serve my company’s mission, how to come back with real actionable steps to improve, I’m putting that challenge out to you all.
Take a step back and think: does this make the boat go faster?
The three-column exercise
Here’s what will happen when you start asking this question. You’ll get to a lot of things and you’ll say, “I really don’t know.”
That is okay.
The exercise (do this now)
Put three columns on a piece of paper.
I actually ask you to do this. If you got to this part of the post, I ask you to actually take this action. 95% of you reading this won’t. That’s okay.
But for the 5% who actually do this, who pause, take out a piece of paper, and put three columns on it, it’s going to do wonders for you. Because you’re actually going to be able to think: does this make the boat go faster?
The three columns
| YES | I DON’T KNOW | NO |
| Activities that clearly help | Activities you’re unsure about | Activities that don’t help |
What to evaluate
Think about you and your high schooler. All the actions that you have done over:
- The last quarter
- The last month
- The last week
- Yes, the last day
If there was nothing the last day, that is okay. But I want you to get that granular.
For each activity, ask: did this activity that my high schooler and I, either together or separate, did it make the boat go faster? Did it help progress my child’s college planning journey? Or did I just do it because someone kind of mentioned maybe I should?
What you’ll discover
Here’s what I expect you’ll find.
The YES column
You’ll have a handful of yeses.
If your child studied for the SAT yesterday, that is a yes. Keep doing it.
These are the activities that clearly move the needle. You know they help. Continue investing time here.
The NO column
You’ll have probably a handful of nos.
Where you say, “Yeah, when I look back on what I did a few months ago with my high schooler, I’m not really sure that really helped.”
Great. Eliminate that.
It is not making the boat go faster. It is not helping your child’s college plan. Eliminate it. Stop spending time and energy there.
The I DON’T KNOW column
But the middle column will likely be full of a bunch of “I don’t knows.”
Right now on my whiteboard, I have a bunch of I don’t knows. That’s okay. Embrace that.
But then here’s the thing: take the final step. Figure out those I don’t knows. Are they yeses or nos?
That’s my entire goal of think week right here: to figure out everything that’s in my I don’t know column and decide, is it going to make the boat go faster? Is it going to help me improve my company’s mission, vision, values? Or is it not?
How to resolve the “I don’t knows”
That’s going to take time. I’m going to have to go find people who know, who have that knowledge I don’t have, to tell me: is it going to make the boat go faster or not?
But that’s the beauty of think week. That’s the beauty of taking time to reflect.
My recommendation
Saying “I don’t know” is a wonderful, wonderful thing.
I implore you, if you’re the parent of a high schooler watching this right now, to embrace “I don’t know” for a lot of these things.
Does it make the boat go faster? Does it help progress my child’s college planning journey? I don’t know.
And then my one recommendation is: when you have all of those things in the I don’t know column, sit down with your high schooler and figure it out.
Resources to help
Yes, of course, if you want to reach out to someone who knows college planning, we are one of those resources.
But guess what? There’s also a thing called Google. There’s also many free resources you can find on our YouTube channel, our blog, our college confidence community.
The point is: don’t let the “I don’t knows” stay as “I don’t knows” forever. Convert them to yeses or nos.
If you want help figuring out what activities actually make the boat go faster for your specific student, take my free College Story Audit. It shows you exactly where you’re strong and where you have gaps.
Think before you do
We live in a world of stimuli. Everyone has advice. Everyone has opinions. Your uncle, your cousin, your neighbor, your neighbor’s cousin, they all have something to say about what your high schooler should be doing.
But not all of it makes the boat go faster.
Take time to reflect. Do the three-column exercise. Embrace the “I don’t knows” and then work to resolve them.
If you want to get things done, work. If you want to get the right things done, think.
Does it make the boat go faster? That’s the only question that matters.
Ready to take the next step?
If you want help figuring out exactly what activities make the boat go faster for your specific student, book a free 45-minute college planning strategy session with our team.
We’ll help you evaluate what you’re currently doing, identify what’s working, eliminate what isn’t, and create a plan focused entirely on high-leverage activities that actually move the needle.
Because our mission is simple: make the boat go faster.
Frequently asked questions about making the boat go faster
What are examples of activities that usually make the boat go faster? SAT/ACT prep, developing a genuine passion project, building deep expertise in one or two areas, taking appropriately rigorous courses, working on your story. The key word is “usually” because it depends on your specific situation and goals.
What are examples of activities that usually don’t make the boat go faster? Generic community service done just to pad a resume, joining clubs where you’re just a member (not a leader or deeply involved), activities done because “everyone does them” rather than genuine interest.
What if my whole “I don’t know” column is full? That’s actually common and okay. It means you’re being honest with yourself. The next step is to research and figure out which column each item belongs in. That’s the work.
How often should I do this exercise? I do a think week every six months. For families, I’d recommend doing this exercise at least once per semester, or whenever you feel overwhelmed by advice and options.
What if my student and I disagree on whether something makes the boat go faster? That’s a great conversation to have. Talk through the reasoning. Sometimes the student has insight the parent doesn’t, and vice versa. The goal is alignment on what actually matters.
Does this mean we should stop everything that’s not a clear “yes”? Not necessarily. Some activities have value beyond college admissions (enjoyment, social connection, skill building). The question is whether you’re doing them because they help with college or for other reasons. Be honest about the purpose.
